“O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I am far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do.” Psalm 139:1-3
I find comfort in knowing that God has thoroughly searched my heart. Although it can bring on thoughts of shame, knowing my many shortcomings so well, the depths of his forgiveness is bottomless for his children. His knowledge of us goes beyond what we are able to comprehend.
A mother carries her child in her womb. At first, just the knowledge that a life has begun within, sparks an ember, a trace of emotional connection. The first fleck of love has taken seed. Curiosity fills her thoughts as she ponders just who this might be that’s growing in her hollow parts. Before long, this hollow brims with form — an inward design of unknown beauty. Mom can feel this little one stretching back and curling up seeking a place of comfort for their growing limbs. She wonders about their personality, what color hair will they have, whose eyes will look back at her? The anticipation of knowing this little soul builds with every passing month.
There are no comparable feelings to a woman giving birth. The overwhelming love in this moment when they meet face to face is held forever in the heart. And yet, she cannot know their thoughts. She cannot know their path ahead. She cannot know everything about them, though this is her longing.
We are limited in our ability to know others. Even our deepest and most intimate relationships have their limitations. We can’t be inside another’s head as they experience this kaleidoscope of life.
But the Lord, the all-knowing Creator of all living things, has searched us. He knows us. He discerns our thoughts and intentions even when we have no thoughts of him. We can’t even objectively know our own hearts fully, let alone someone else’s. However, in this passage of Scripture we learn that God knows us completely— to our very core. He knows everything we do, even our thoughts before we think them. There is no one more intimately connected to us than God.
This is and should be, somewhat unsettling. After all, we can be quite good at concealing our subterranean selves. However, the comfort comes when we understand how deeply we matter to the God of the universe. He secretly thinks about us and he knows our secrets and keeps our confidence. There is no greater love than this…to be seen, heard, known and accepted.