We said goodbye to our nephew Cody. His life was cut so short, darkened by a harsh and oppressive world of addiction that gripped his soul like a pit bull. When those fangs latch on it can seem near impossible to break free. The darkness keeps circling in and dragging the soul toward a black hole.
I remember him as a little boy, so innocent, so happy, his face all lit up with a wide smile and a twinkle in his eye. As the years moved on that smile didn’t show up as much and the twinkle began to dull over into a kind of flatness that was hard to read. Life’s wounds and traumas etched their way down deep to places he kept locked up and hidden. Rather than bare his soul from the shame that branded his heart, he just kept painting it over with the blackness of chemical relief. The thing about that kind of relief is the deception of its lure. It’s powerful promise disguised as peace, with no need for understanding, is a temporary escape only to lure you back for more until you are bound and chained in submission.
There is so much hope in the face of a child. All that wide-eyed wonder of discovery and the innocence of ignorance, How I wish I could protect all these young ones from the harsh realities of a world where the light grows dimmer with each passing year.
But, despite this encroaching darkness, and my inability to save them all, there is still great hope amidst the loss of innocence. While life’s traumas and wounds can’t always be diverted, they don’t have to end in a black hole. A black hole happens when a star is dying, when it is falling in upon itself and collapsing. Even the light gets sucked into it. This is what shame does. It hides in the darkness, too afraid to come into the light, turning further and further inward. But, there is a light that is too great to be drawn into the blackness. On the contrary, it blasts open the black hole breaking its powerful, gravitational pull and releasing all the dark matter that formed it. Jesus said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." (John 8:12) because he wants this for us, “that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, (Philippians 2:15). Because, “the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God..For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.(2 Corinthians 4:4,6) The god of the black hole doesn’t want freedom for the wounded souls. But the God of the universe is all about freedom.
Cody knew about the light. He even stepped into it, felt the warmth upon his face and the peace that passes understanding. He just didn’t stay there long enough to bind up those wounds and release the shame. So he suffered. He didn’t think he was worthy. But who is? Only the Son of God —and he is shining his light into the darkness with an outstretched hand that was pierced for you and me. He took all that shame so we wouldn’t have to. He makes us worthy by that act of love. Step into that light. Cody would want you to. He knows the truth,,,